Where do you want to spend eternity?

 

A series of events in my life recently compelled me to think about what Jesus meant by the words, “But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven” –Matthew 10:33. This in turn made me think of other questions, once one goes to hell, does that mean that you are wiped out completely from the face of God? (just like the phrase we so often use, wiped out from the face of the earth?) Will there be another covenant or will that be the end of the person?

The thoughts of this frighten me, as I couldn’t imagine the fate of the one who has been rejected by the God because he/she rejected Him while on earth yet He made it so simple for us while on earth through the death and resurrection of His Son Jesus –Romans 10:9,10.

The thought at the same time sent chills down my spine thinking about a person’s eternal fate. I couldn’t help imagine a loud voice, louder than the loudest thunder ever heard, tell one “GET OUT OF MY SIGHT, I DO NOT KNOW YOU!” and immediately you go tumbling down into the lake of fire bearing all that rejection, rejection that you have never ever felt in your whole life, nothing can compare to it, nothing that you’ve ever had to endure. All these with the thoughts’ running down your mind, ‘why didn’t I listen while on earth?’ ‘I wish I knew better!” But it’s oh no! it’s too late!

One thing for sure, we definitely don’t want to be in this position or imagine anyone in that position when judgment time comes. The questions I keep asking myself are; why is it so easy for others to believe and so hard for others? What is there to doubt after the many miracles we’ve read time and time again from the Scriptures and miracles we’ve probably seen or heard through other people’s testimonies that we may know? The creation also speaks of God, the skies and clouds, the rain and sunshine, the seas and oceans, the mountains and yes, you –your eyes that you use to see, your ears that you use to hear, your mouth that you use to speak, your nose that you use to smell and breath…no human being can create this, only God did! –Genesis 1-2:22. So why don’t we see it?

As Christians, I believe God wants us to reach out to every single heart that wants to know the truth about Him -to those who don’t know where to start, to those who don’t know what the truth really is, to those who have found truth but are still lingering, to those who think life is just a game and eventually some win and some loose. And not forgetting, those who are totally sold out for God and are serving Him faithfully and need to hear that they are living real and they shouldn’t give up but keep pressing on. In Jesus, we all have the opportunity to win and finally find a resting place here on earth which goes on to eternity –“May Your will be done on earth as it is done in heaven –Matthew 6:10b”.

I have this platform to tell you about Who God is, I can never take the place of the Bible but I can speak of what I hear from Him. I have seen Him in my life in major ways and I wish I could share everything with you. In the meantime, I do what I can do now while praying that He will continue to show me what His purpose in my life is. He continues to teach me (because I am the first to admit that I am still in the race, I haven’t reached, never have –Phillipians 3:12 but I am one person who can prove that God can use anyone –‘if God can use a donkey, why not I’ –Numbers 22:30). Before I was born, He is the One who chose that I come to this earth for a purpose and I’m excited to know it and live it.

If you know the truth about God Almighty, Creator of Heaven and earth, the one who created you and sent Jesus to die on the cross for, don’t ever hesitate to tell someone else who may not know and is searching or not searching and pray that God would reveal Himself to him/her just like He revealed Himself to you so that you started to believe. Through the answer to this prayer, he/she will bear his/her own conviction.

This is my heart that we would tell the truth about God with every opportunity given to us.

As Christians, keep your testimony intact because you don’t know who’s watching and may stumble because you don’t do as you believe or prophess to believe. And for those looking to judge, we ought to know that it’s not up to us to stumble because of other people’s example because at the end of the day, just like Paul in Phillipians 3:12, “we (Christians) are all still in the race” and it doesn’t end now but there may be more times when we may fall because we are not perfect, but always keeping in our minds that calls us to be “holy as He is Holy”.

 

Silence?

Is it possible that silence can speak so loud?

Is it possible that I could be interpreting the right words to the silence spoken?

Someone once said, that most words are spoken in silence.

I can interpret, I say, but then I take a step back,

I don’t want to interpret the silence for something that’s not true, I shout.

Could it be that the silence means, “Look before you leap”, or is it before you lip?

I shout and keep shouting but the silence communicated makes it harder to keep calm within even though all you seen is calm,

But my heart is in anguish while I try to interpret what the silence could mean.

But if the silence means, look before you leap/lip, then I will keep silent too.

I interpret the silence …

“sometimes silence seems to connect us in a way words never could”.

And I begin to smile again, because the silence I interpreted came out to be true.

It was waiting for everything to be perfect, for everything to fall right into place,

So that words that would never have been spoken then, can be spoken now.

To understand that words not spoken can sometimes mean what we want it to mean,

Or to understand that the writer saw something when he said, “that’s it’s in silence that most words are spoken” or follow the other writer who said, that ‘no news could sometimes mean good news’

I want to be sure that it speaks of what I think, of what I feel, of what I want so dearly, so I run to God.

And then I rest with the fact that it could very well mean what I don’t want to hear.

And I ask, is it well with my soul, will it be well with my soul?

I see God and see what His character says about me,

About my life, about what He wants for me,

And I trust, I trust that all will be well and one day, I can appreciate the silence

And see, live, watch it’s spoken word and be at peace with myself, with the world and with who I am at the time.

And it’s all because of God.

Then the silence means something, something deeper than I had anticipated.

The silence makes sense again because at the time it was required,

Not to set me in anguish but to speak of it’s importance,

It was needed even though I didn’t see it or understand why,

But oh too well, the conclusion is drawn,

It was needed to work out for what was best at the time and for the future.

All I hope and pray is that in the silence, I can still see God’s loving Father Hands in control,

Otherwise the silence will be hard to endure,

I know that one day words will be spoken to cover the silence that was,

And in that day, I will be at peace knowing that I am where He wants me to be.

The future –if silence means what God wants it to mean,

Then the future looks great,

Because all the words that would have been spoken, yet were not meant to be,

Are being spoken in what was waited for in earnest longing,

It may not be what I, we expected,

But we know that in God, the silence spoke the right words.

Giving our lives to The Lord ...

So yeah, if you can see this, it’s meant for you;

You need to give your lives to Jesus as soon as possible and not only do so but live lives that give Him glory. Meaning, you have to let go of all the things that do not represent Him as our Saviour in your new life. 

To start you off, it’s because of the love God has for us that He sent His only Son to die on the cross for us –John 3:16. When we accept this we receive eternal life.

Secondly, the only way you can receive eternal life is by believing in the above fact in your heart and then with confessing with your mouth  –Romans 10:9, 10.

Thirdly, to be able to live in this new life you have to keep Romans 12:1,2 in mind, heart and as part of your lives. Do not copy the behaviours and patterns of this world, but be a new and different person ….

Then live it out loving the One God who is true and loves you more than you can imagine. He’s got great plans but if you deny Him, He also will and who knows when the end is except Him. Yep, if you don’t give your life to Him, you are headed for eternal death. As Christians we believe in eternal or what is called everlasting life (John 3:16).

It’s time you/we all recognize who God is, Almighty and give Him all the respect that’s due to Him. We humans are nothing  except through Him. Without Him we are nothing and if it wasn’t for God calling us to being, we wouldn’t be here now. He called us to being so that we can serve and worship Him here on earth as it will be in Heaven one day when He calls us to be with Him. We also are called to give our testimony to others and pray for their salvation if they haven’t yet given their lives to Him. 

 “Every tree that does not bear fruit, will be cut out” –Matthew 3:10.

It’s not enough to give your lives to the Lord, you have to live out His standards too, which are pure and holy –Romans 12:1, 2.

"Leaving" Thika ...

Days ago i spent my last night in this beloved town. A town that will always hold a dear place in my heart. It's hard to believe that years ago, this is the place i got lost and wasn't to be found until i recently remembered my past, it presented an opportunity for me to remember ...

Moving there weeks before was all "green", i didn't know what to expect or what the town held for me. It was hard of course, coming from the city and having lived there for the most part of my life and "going there for the very first time....." Only to come and see familiar surroundings which brought lots of memories about my early years. I didn't even remember this place and as far as i was concerned, i had never been to Thika town.

It has had it's struggles and joys, but i'll remember the joys mostly and hold them fondly. It has had it's firsts and "lasts". I'll remember the firsts. It has taught me to step out boldly and learn how to be independent, something i didn't know how because i always relied on others, which is totally different from my early years -i always could do things on my own and very confidently, at a young age and you'll never believe how much. What changed? That's what i keep asking myself ... Being in Kenya all those years has changed me alot but i'm excited to going back to who i was, mostly because, i guess, it's now part of growing up.

It's teaching me to look forward to the "firsts" i experienced and how to share the joys. It's teaching me to be excited about life no matter where i am, how i am or who i'm with. It's opened my heart to accept new things and not let go of the old as they are important as well. It's shaping me to be someone i never thought i'd ever be, well, mostly because i just didn't think i would, "funny" enough, i was. It's teaching me to take steps, it's teaching me to embrace a day at time and not go over my head coz it's very easy for me to. With all the excitement it brings, i will admit, i'm nervous as well. I keep asking myself, if i am able, at the same time, i want to see whether i can do it -not escaping the feelings that an opportunity has been created for me to be something i've never been before but only dreamt of. I can't help planning, wondering what, how i'll play my part while not being too programmed, well, because of the planning.....

And yes, it's teaching me to forgive, all the hurt and pain; and to know that people do make mistakes, i have to and need to be forgiven as well. It's teaching me to love, inspite of, despite of, unconditionally. Kenya is/has been teaching me most of my life and i hope to hold what's helpful -not only for me but for others as well.

to be cont.

I write, because i'm excited about what opened up for me while being in Thika. I want to write a song about Thika, the song in my heart and share it when i can... 

People react to things differently ...

During the past couple of months i've really struggled with my relationship with God. I've been a christian most of my life and had made up my mind to stay strong and do as God Wills over my life. I remember that time being the best time of my life with lots to look forward to. Every one who had stood by me when i made this decision, looked very happy. I wanted to know, what makes all these people so happy (joyful)? I came to find out that, The Lord's Joy was their strength and would be mine as well. It was easier when i was younger, coz, not only did i depend on God for everything but also on my parents and adults around me. Growing up into my twenties was another story, i had to adapt to "live" on my own, make more adult friendships, etc which was part of my growing up process and should be for anyone else. I got support from Christian friends who backed me up and "held" me every time i needed them. God Amazed me with wonderful relationships which i'll always be thankful for. No one really ever hurt me and i had never known hurt. It was always very easy for me to give knowing that i'll get what i gave and even more in return.

The past couple of years, going to the past couple of months was a different story altogether. I realized that in some of those "strong" relationships i had made, people change. It never occured to me that this would really happen. Friends always are friends, well, at least that's what i thought. Don't people just continue from where they left? I always did in my mind, knowing that when i see them again, we'd just continue ... I relied on those relationships waiting for the day we'll just continue. It didn't matter how far we were from each other or how long we'd be apart.

But people change ...
Is it fair to say everyone?

Does that mean i didn't? Was i being unfair to expect what i had always been expecting? I never really asked any of those long "ago" relationships whether i had. Well, to cut that part of the story short, things didn't turn out the way i had always expected them to. I'm trying to be open at the same time trying to hide the fact that even those relationships that i thought wouldn't change, did change as well.

I had to learn how not rely on people any more. My relationship with God was meant to go to a different level but unfortunately, i decided to take "my road" and try to make things work for me. I wasn't sure if i'd be patient enough to wait for God to take control. I have always believed that He was but the pain for me was unbearable ....Years later, my actions affected what had always been very important to me -my relationship with God. I constantly find myself wanting to work harder to earn God's Trust in me again. I tend to fall every time a familiar sound, action, place comes to mind .... I don't want to go back, is always my struggle. I want to trust God to Work things out in my life again. I know He Can because i've seen Him Do alot for me before. "Going back" are the things i constantly lived away from.

My heart: to grow but looking at The Author of my life and how His Word Says i ought to live. But i struggle alot, every time i'm brought back to what had been when i tried to work things out for myself. I regret so much that i took matters into my own hands to make things work...

you wanna know what's "funny" "not funny", i wasn't able to work anything out at all when "i took matters into my own hands". I'm learning to rely on God so that i can handle change (something i wasn't able to do before because i had no experience of). The disappointment, i guess just really got to me. It would be hard for the reader to understand, but in a few words, i was totally on my own when i thought i will always have people around me.

Well, i talk of my past now ...the non-fruits i bore are what i've had to struggle with ...trying to get back to where i was.

Many would say, you need to forgive yourself... It's easy to say that but hard to put in practice every time i see how strained my Walk with God has become. I desire with my whole heart to be who God Created me to be and to work on it. My cry, that i don't sleep ...I want to stay awake and experience what His Word says, "...we move from Glory to Glory..."